It's one of Jonathan Lethem's promiscuous songs. I couldn't let the ever-generous Tchatchke have all the fun, could I? John Linnell of They Might Be Giants and Haunt have already made versions of it. The lyrics are over here.
(Update: 4/20 3:31 p.m. PDT — slightly improved mix compresses vocals, lowers space organ levels slightly, adds "ketchup" to vocal; earlier mix goes bye-bye)